Monday, May 16, 2016

I do Yoga because I love myself

It's a strange thing, realizing you have somehow completely lost yourself. When I was a teenager and self worth seemed to be base on who liked you I struggled! It wasn't until I was in my 20's that I realized who I am and that I LOVED myself. I had the perfect life! I was single, and I didn't care! I took care of myself!! I still dreamed and wanted a family desperately. I wanted to be a wife and a mother. But it wasn't until I first loved myself that I was able to let someone else love me enough to marry me... and he did. 
Today while getting lunch for the kids I decided to turn on some Yoga videos, maybe just to watch them, maybe to do one or two pose. I don't remember doing any Yoga since I got married but Yoga was a huge part of my life before. It was one of the ways I found balance and happiness in my life. 
When I turned the first video on I followed the simple instructions to take a deep breath and to my surprise it felt amazing, like breathing for the first time in ages! I finished giving the kids lunch and got them down for their afternoon nap all while playing Yoga videos in the background. Once they were asleep I decided to find a simple short video and actually do it. I stood straight for the first pose, a pose I've done so many times before, took a deep breath, and started crying. It felt like I was seeing my best friend after years of being apart. 
I have spent so long being mrs. B, mamma (mum) or the makup lady that I forgot who Unnur is. She is so much fun!!! Mrs. B takes care of and loves her husband, mum takes care of and loves her kids, the makeup lady takes care of and loves her customers... Unnur needs to come back, for at least a little bit every day, because she takes care of and loves herself! She makes Mrs. B, mum and the makeup lady so much better at what they do best. I've missed her! 

1 comment:

Nancy said...

Oh goodness. Now that I only occasionally check my blog feed reader from my phone, I'm terrible at ever commenting. But love "hearing" from you and seeing you are finding satisfaction in motherhood and in discovering (rediscovering, keeping) who you still are and how you as you blend with motherhood. Happy!