Dear audience, please turn off your cell phones and try not to fart.

Short story, My lil nephew took me to the movies last night, yup he paid and everything, what a gentleman! So since he paid he picked the movie, we saw Hancock. It was surprisingly good and I actually wouldn't mind seeing it again. Maybe even borrowing it from one place or another at some point. Anyways, the movie was good but we sat right close to this lady who wasn't a lady at all! I mean, she was a woman all right, but no lady. Let me explain...no...there is to much...let me sum up.... so she kept talking the whole time and then every few minutes she would fart, not like a cute little baby fart, but like a frikin horn, I am pretty sure everyone in there heard her farting. The first time it happened I was like "wow, thats embarrassing" and then she did it again....and again...and again...all through the movie. I didn't want to turn around and stare at her in case she was retarded or something. So I just sat there as the air got polluted by one woman and her gas problems. I didn't actually smell anything though, it was an amazing experience, I recommend you try it if you ever get the chance!