Monday, February 28, 2011

progress...


Turns out being happy can also result in lots of blog posts... Last night was totally awesome and awkward!
The short version of the story goes something like this: I was in charge of the FHE lesson for the young single adults, so as I am passing out hymn books two guys from a foreign country were talking in their language which I do not speak, and when I turn around I see they are both looking at me so I spontaneously say "stop talking about me" not really thinking they were talking about me for real. However, the two of them go red as a tomato in the face and surprised say "how did you know we were talking about you?!?" which then got me all awkward! So I just laughed and went on with family home evening... After FHE one of the guys came over and told me they were "just talking about how beautiful you are, and wondering if you have a boyfriend, because I want to...." and the rest of it I didn't understand. It made me laugh....

I have a group of friends whose lives seem to be perfect. They have the husband, the kids, the house, the car, the callings, the jobs, the life I wish I had. It has been difficult lately feeling happy for those friends. I haven't read their blogs for forever because I couldn't handle it. It felt like going to a friends house after Christmas when they got all the presents I wanted and all I got were PJs and a book.
Today I read a blog written by one of those friends... and for the first time in a long time I was so happy for them, that they have all those wonderful blessings. But at the same time I was happy to return to my PJs and book after reading the blog. See, my book is awesome! and I love PJs! I can't wait to have the family, the house, the car and the whole deal, but I am thankful for what I have too. How could I not be! I am so thankful!! hahah and I can't even explain why... I can't say "I am so thankful for my life because it is honestly so much better than my friends lives" I don't believe thats true... I am not comparing anymore. I am just thankful!! its not complicated, its just true.

For some reason I can't forget a dream I had about this friend whose blog I was reading. I had the dream a long long time ago. I was standing in a tall tall building in a beautiful room. The room was all I ever wanted. As I was looking at the room a man walked up to me and told me all this belonged to my friend, then he pointed me to the window and showed me the view outside, and said all of that belonged to my friend too. As I looked at the view I noticed the building was growing taller and the view was getting even more beautiful, and I started getting jealous because all this, the room and the world belonged to my friend. Then the man told me "don't worry, you are next".
Many of my friends have gotten married and started families and bought houses and cars since I had that dream. Many of my friends are starting relationships right now, relationships with wonderful men. I wish I had that. Maybe I wasn't next. But I am still living and loving life.
I may not always remember, but I can be patient. I am happy for my friends, for their blessings and their happiness. I am also happy for my blessings. I am very thankful :)

3 comments:

MiriamR said...

Hey Unnur, you pretty much sumed up what I find myself doing all the time. For the longest time I was like oh look all my friends are going to school and traveling and just doing whatever they want and I tend to get envious. I too and learning to be happy with my life and to enjoy the things I have and also feel happy for others for all the cool stuff they get to do and experience. It's hard though and I fall off the boat all the time and think "I want to do that!!" anyways thanks for the insights, Love you Unnur. I know you will find a person that deserves you and isn't a loser and makes you feel like the most important person in the world because that is what you will be. The End :)

Maliana said...

you are marvelous and i think everyone gets those moments of jealousy! arg to being human! and at the same time yay to being human! but im glad you are seeing how great your life is!

hear hear to miriam! i cant wait to meet that guy, he will be as amazing as you!

p.s. im so curious about those guys now :p

Unifer said...

hahah Miriam, did you know that dream was about you :D you are the one I was jealous of :D its so funny how satan tries to pull us down sometimes! I was talking to Sóley about this the other day too, and she said the same thing! everyone can be jealous of someone! and everyone is jealous of someone at one point or another (or at many points! :D) But I do love my life, I am thankful I get to wake up every day and be me and do the things I get to do... I just keep praying and hoping and believing God will bless me with blessings He has already promised!!
Maliana you are the sweetest person! I absolutely love you!! thank you for being my friend and listening :D Eyþór gave me a big hug on Sunday and said he hopes everything will work out, it meant a lot to me, and I am so glad you guys are together! you are the kind of couple I hope to be half of one day!
I love you all!! my life would not be the same without you sisters and your families!! HUGS!!